There is no room for ill will in a
fulfilling sexual relationship. How does ill will sabotage fulfillment of
sexual love in marriage?
1.
Sets a cold emotional climate in a marriage
2.
Creates tension and stress
3.
Increases hurt or resentful feelings
Sean E. Brotherson said: “No
aspect of marriage is more sensitive to emotional upheaval than the sexual
relationship. An angry word will pour cold water on a spouse’s romantic “on”
switch more quickly than you can imagine, while a meaningful apology can pave
the way to a gentle invitation toward intimacy.” Much like repair attempts,
compliments, kind words and affection go a long way in creating a warm climate
in a marriage. Mutual interest and attraction between spouses grow when
criticism, and anger are kept at bay. Satan’s strategy is to stir up anger
between family members including husband and wife. Col 3:19 says “Husbands,
love your wives, and be not bitter against them.” We need to be extra vigilant
about not allowing ill will to become a cycle. Just as anger is a choice, we
must choose to stop the cycle. Getting caught in a cycle of ill will is a
self-inflicted pain. We must put in the time, energy and love to stop the
cycle.
To warm up the climate in my own
marriage I have decided and put in the effort to put my phone down more often.
I know my feelings are hurt when I want my spouse’s attention and he is on his
phone. It makes me feel unimportant and creates ill will. Putting my phone down
is one small way I can choose to make our relationship a priority.
What can you do to create a “warm”
emotional atmosphere in your relationships?
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